United We Stand.

We’ll hear those words a lot today. I hope someone actually stops to think about them.

Today is a day of collective memory.  Every single American above the age of 7 has an individual recollection of the horror they felt six years ago when the towers came down, our fortress was breached, and the very skies above our heads became an enemy.  The experiences were all different – some were there, some lost family and friends, some watched the terror unfold watching tv over their morning coffee, some heard about it at work or school and thought – no, this can’t be - only to have the awful reality slowly creep in.

But although each experience was different, they were also all fundamentally the same.  We all felt shock, and grief, and sadness at the loss of so many innocent, normal, ordinary lives.  We all felt fear at what was happening and why.  We all felt anger that our borders were breached and our own way of living was turned into weapons used to destroy us.  

We’ve spent the last 6 years collecting stories, whether we know it or not.  My ex-husband (then my fiance) was living just across the Hudson at the time and also visited the towers a week before they fell.  My mom was supposed to be in the city that day and plans were unexpectedly changed.  She was there – a block away, and ran through the clouds of smoke and ash to safety.  A good friend from high school luckily escaped.  Another friend’s brother unfortunately did not.  A close friend was driving past the Pentagon when the plane fly over his head and plowed into the building only a few hundred yards away. We all heard about the bravery and self-sacrifice of the first responders.  We all remember the massive blood drives for life-saving blood which was, unfortunately, never needed.  We all marveled at the randomness at all – who was spared, who perished; there was no rhyme or reason to any of it.         

Today, I think about those stories.  My own memories from the day, and the stories I’ve heard and absorbed over the years.  I’ll wish, futily, of course, there is an election next year, that the people in charge of publicly representing us all will put aside their scheming and points-watching for just one day, and resist the temptation to use this day for partisan bickering that only perverts what happened and the loss that we suffered.  I’ll wish, futily again, that people won’t use a national tragedy as a forum to air their own personal biases and prejudices against fellow Americans who experienced the same sadness and shock, but with an additional sense of fear that their own countrymen may turn against them because of the country their parents were born in, the color of their skin, the style of their hair, the religion they practice, the language they speak or the clothes that they wear.

For me, my best memories of 9/11, if it’s possible to even say such a thing, was a nation united by sadness and grief, but also a firm resolve that we would not allow those needless, senseless, tragic deaths to be in vain.  The flags.  The spontaneous singing.  The determination.  The strength.  I just hope that the memories of those people, of that day, will not be twisted by those who forget that healing sense of unity and who instead see this day as an opportunity to further a particular agenda.  Tomorrow – we can argue about war and politics and Attorneys General and WMDs and gay marriage and all the rest.  Tomorrow - I can once again focus on the frivolity of my own life – work and boys and diets and beer and messy apartments and petty squabbles with friends and whether my dog needs a bath and how much money I’ll spend on a new pair of fall shoes.  But Today – it’s not just an ordinary day.  Today – I will mourn and remember.  Today – I will try to be just a little bit nicer to the people around me, not knowing who may be having a much more difficult day than me.  Today – I will be thankful to be here to have all of this frivolous crap to worry about.  And Tomorrow – maybe I’ll take some of this with me and have a little more perspective on what is really important.